Couples & Relationship

Therapy in Berlin

Prenzlauer Berg & Online, English-Speaking

In my practice, relationship counselling is a collaborative, evidence-based process. I work with all relationship constellations and identities, providing a structured space to navigate complex conflict. Whether in-person in Prenzlauer Berg or online, we move beyond surface-level content to the core dynamics of your partnership.

“Above all, it's the quality of your relationships that will determine the quality of your life.” - Esther Perel

Purpose.

The goal of our work is to identify the unseen dynamic of your relationship: the emotional patterns, attachment needs, and nervous system responses that shape how you relate under stress. By understanding the relationship system, we slow down reactive cycles and build a secure foundation where you feel met, heard, and seen.

Couples therapy /relationship therapy may be for you if you wish to:

  • De-escalate Circular Arguments: Understand the deeper emotional triggers happening underneath the repetitive friction.

  • Break the Distance Cycle: Stop editing yourself or staying quiet to keep the peace, and start communicating your needs.

  • Navigate High-Stakes Stress: Manage relationship transitions, relocation, or professional burnout without losing your connection.

  • Restore Safety After Rupture: Rebuild trust and intimacy following betrayal, a painful transition, or a period of disconnect.

  • Move from Protection to Connection: Identify automatic protective patterns (shutdown, anger, or defensiveness) and replace them with choice and empathy.

  • (Re)discover Vibrant Intimacy: Cultivate a deep, emotional and physical connection that feels resilient through life's changes.

Approach.

Sometimes, it is one person in the relationship who advocates for therapy. That is okay. Whatever brings you here - whether it’s a shared desire for change or one person's brave nudge - showing up is the most important part.

My approach to couples therapy is based on Emotionally-Focussed Therapy (EFT); this evidence-based approach looks to the neurobiology of attachment and the biological necessity of feeling safe in our core relationships.

Together, we look past the high-conflict moments and the painful silences to understand the underlying emotional signals that tell us whether we are truly seen and valued.

By gently mapping the repetitive patterns of pursuit and withdrawal that keep you at a distance, we work to dissolve defensiveness and make room for a deeper, more vulnerable way of relating. My role is to provide a soft, non-judgmental space where you can explore these attachment longings and fears, ultimately transforming your relationship into a secure base that fosters mutual healing, renewed intimacy, and a lasting sense of belonging.

Process.

OPTION ONE: ideal if you have questions or want to fit-test first
  • Following a short discovery call at no cost (which you can book here), we will both have the opportunity to reflect if we are a good fit to work together. There is no obligation following the call, so please enter lightly knowing you have time to make a decision.

  • If we proceed, you will receive a link to book a full length session, which typically lasts 60-80mins.

OPTION TWO: ideal if you want to jump-in immediately
  • You are welcome to book an initial intake session immediately (which you can book here); this is a 80min session where we start the process right away. This first session is offered online only.

  • Following the intake session, we will both have an opportunity to reflect if we can make progress together.

  • If we proceed, you will receive a link to book further full length sessions. This will be either in-person, or online.

FOR ALL
  • We will begin with 3 session but the total number and cadence is open. As a guide, my clients generally find it most beneficial to meet 12+ times over 4+ months.

  • The standard rate for our time together is €150 per hour. If this rate is currently a barrier for you, please get in touch so we can explore options together.

  • Rather than being indefinitely on-going, our intention is for the working relationship to find a natural close.

More about Emotionally Focussed Therapy:

I use Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) because it is one of the most rigorously researched and evidence-based methods availableResearch consistently shows that 70-75% of couples moving through EFT move from distress to recovery, with 90% of couples reporting significant improvements. 

When a relationship feels strained or uneven, it's easy to get stuck in the content of the friction: the specific way they just sighed at you, the sadness of feeling alone, or the argument about the dishwasher that is not about the dishwasher.

While these moments are important to find a way through, focussing only on them rarely leads to lasting change. 

The reason EFT works is that it addresses our biological wiring.

We are built to need a secure base in our partner. When that connection feels threatened - even in the smallest of ways - our nervous system reacts before our logical brain can catch up. One person may "protest" the distance by pushing for answers or finding fault, while the other might try to preserve the peace by "withdrawing" or shutting down.

Every relationship dynamic has a predictable, logical pattern of protection. When we map this cycle, we can see it for what it is. The problem isn't you, and it isn't your partner - it’s this wave of reaction.

Once we tame the cycle, the friction about parenting styles/mental load/finances become problems you solve together, without your nervous systems being under threat. 

Frequently asked questions

  • Relationship distress is, at its core, a survival response. When we feel disconnected from our person, our nervous system enters a state of panic. EFT is the gold standard for relationship change because it doesn't just manage conflict; it reshapes the emotional bond. By focusing on the neurobiology of attachment, we address the root cause of the loop you find yourselves in. When the bond is secure, the issues you once fought over or triggered each other with become much easier to navigate together.

  • I welcome all relationship configurations. My focus is on the attachment bond and the unique emotional landscape between the people involved, regardless of the structure. All identities and ways of loving are honoured.

  • That’s perfectly OK. We move at a pace that feels safe for everyone involved, honouring the courage it takes to show up even when you are uncertain.

  • You can first book a chemistry call/initial consultation (online) appointment. This will give us a chance to decide whether we can work together and if we should continue.

  • Yes. Online and in-person sessions are both offered. When booking, you’ll be able to select which you prefer.

    There may be times when only online sessions are offered, this will be visible before booking.

  • I have extensive experience in trauma informed support across multiple specialities, including;

    Compassionate Inquiry (a modality designed and instructed by Dr Gabor Maté and Sat Dharam Kaur);

    Emotionally Focussed Couples Therapy (EFT);

    Psychedelic care;

    Hostile and Conflict environments;

    Mental health (with Postpartum Support International); and

    Somatic modalities as a qualified yoga and meditation instructor.

    As I come from outside the psychotherapy field, my services do not include diagnosis or treatment of psychological conditions.

    You are welcome to read more about my background here.

Testimonials

  • “We felt like we were speaking different languages. Kate helped us find the common ground again. We finally feel like we're on the same team.”

  • “As a non-traditional couple, we were worried about being judged. Instead, we found a space that was incredibly inclusive and deeply insightful.”

  • “Kate helped us understand the ‘why’ behind the fighting and the problems. It has changed how we interact every single day.”